Let It Go

Just as I teach I also maintain my practice. This week, during Dawn's Yin (friend and studio owner of Yoga Divita) class, she read a poem by Rev. Safire Rose. I had never heard it before and would like to share it with you...

As she read this poem and I held the poses I took notice of how my body grips and hold tight as I start a pose. It's through breath and the calming of my mind I start to release and let go. By the time the 3-5 minutes we hold the pose is up I have just settled in and it's time to shift. Just as I noticed this in my practice I was able to see how I do this in life. My immediate response to challenge or change is to grip and hold on tight to thoughts or behaviors as if I have some form of control until I remind myself to breath through it and guide myself through the surrender. I'll be honest. Sometimes I do this with ease and other times not so much. This practice was a reminder that when we truly let go there is no effort. How lovely life is right here and now when we completely surrender ourselves to it and let go of our stories about it. 

When I fell in love with my husband I fell in love fast and so did he. The difference between him and I is he allowed himself to fall without fear. I resisted at first due to fear of being hurt and the ongoing question of, "Can this be real if it's happening so fast?" Then, I remember being on a hillside in Tuscany looking into his eyes. My heart filled with an overflowing abundance of love and I let go. I let go of all the questions, concerns and fears. I completely surrendered to life in that moment and completely surrendered to love. To feeling love for him and to being loved. I remember feeling like a weight had been lifted. I felt light as a feather. Completely connected and aligned. By letting go I allowed life to give me the most beautiful gift I have ever received before. 

Right here, right now.... 

Let It Go

Do you have a story of when you let go? Share in the comments below :)

A New Spring. A New You.

On March 20th the Spring Equinox came into fruition on top of being a new moon. What does that even mean?! Well to some it won't mean a thing but to those that follow nature as a tool for guidance, it means a great deal.

The season of spring brings an abundance of new fresh life. The trees are budding bright green leaves. The flowers are blooming. The sun is shining stronger. The days are growing warmer and longer. (Of course depending on where you are in the country this will either hold true today or not but will hold true at some point) Pollen is being spread like wild fire and bees are buzzing. The earth is awakening from her sleeping slumber of winter and so are we. 

We start to have more energy and spend more days outside. We too soak in the warm sun and allow it to kiss our skin into a warm glow like plants. We naturally have the urge to let go of old and create space for the new as we spring clean our homes. All the contemplation of new years resolutions and goals come into action as we take in the energy of spring. Winter is a time for planting seeds and Spring is the time they come into bloom. 

Just as spring represents new beginnings so does a new moon. A new moon reminds us to look within and connect to our higher purpose while starting new. The fact that the Spring Equinox and New Moon were in sync this year proves to be even more powerful for new beginnings. Of course you don't have to believe it in an astrological way but can still use what is happening in nature as a tool to encourage you to connect and create. 

Any any given moment we have a choice to start over, to re-create but now is the time the season is completely in line with you as it too is re-creating life. Allow nature to inspire you and support you in this time if you are thinking of starting something new and remember we are not separate from nature. We are a working, living, breathing piece of it. This is also a great time to give back to our mother earth. Plant a tree. Start a garden. Clean a beach. Help an animal. 

Just as Spring was about to arrive on the calendar the sun was already shining warm here in South Carolina. It's beauty inspired me to run again. I haven't ran in 2 years due to a foot injury (which has been hard for me since I would once have considered myself an avid runner) but the warmth and beauty of the season encouraged me to try and let go of my fears. I drove myself to my favorite park where there is a one mile trail run around this beautiful man-made lake. I put my ear-buds in and started slowly. Next thing I knew I running effortlessly with the gentle wind at my side. I felt like a bird flying for the first time after being caged for two years. I must have smiled the entire time.It was beautiful. 

I since, have ran five more times and feel fantastic (of course adding lots of hamstring stretches to my yoga practice helps as well). That being said, I am allowing nature to guide me through this re-birth taking it easy and connecting to patience. Just as the flowers and leaves come out gracefully, I too am allowing myself to bud with ease. This teaches me to do the same within the new projects I am working on as well.  By running outside I connect with nature and my center just as I do with meditation and asana.


There's no one way to do this we all have our ways. So, I encourage you to connect with nature in your way during this transition to find the lessons it provides for you as it awakens your inner wisdom to guide you on your path.  

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be." ~Lao Tzu

No Journey But Your Own

With social media, "reality" TV, and the praising of pop culture it's no wonder it's so easy to lose sight of what really matters. It's just too easy to peer into someone else's life and compare your own. Of course most of us know that we aren't seeing the whole picture. We only see what others want us to see for the most part. Think about it. When was the last time you took a picture of you and your partner during or after a fight, or took a picture when you were feeling sad or lonely to share with the world. We don't want to remember the hard times, only the happy and inspiring ones so needless to say that's mostly what you will see being posted. Of course there are the occasional "social media-lites" that prefer to complain but we all know they aren't the most popular.

We used to try and "keep up with the Jones'". Now we try to "Keep up with the Kardashians" (so to speak). Our televisions are filled with "reality TV" shows of the rich and famous or people trying to become famous as if this is what real life looks like. As if is what makes someone's life memorable. It's incredible how many children now want to be famous instead of becoming care takers, fireman or astronauts.

I lived in Los Angeles for three years. I loved living in a city where culture, and art are a part of everyday life. I loved having something new to experience everyday if I so choose. I loved being surrounded by like minded, creative people and being close to some of the coolest beaches in the US. I loved that movies were filmed on my street corner and that I lived in the city everyone was entertained by on television. I loved performing in historical night clubs like the Viper Room on Sunset Blvd and I loved my studio apartment over looking Capitol Records and the Hollywood sign. I was singing at night and teaching yoga during the day. According to my public profile I was living the dream and that's how I liked it.


The truth was I wasn't happy. I couldn't find a relationship that was mutual. My gigs weren't paying enough to pay the bills and neither was yoga so I worked odd jobs I hated to stay afloat. I struggled and was depressed at the fact I had worked so hard to become a recognized performer and even though I had the talent and the drive I was still in wonder if I would be able to pay for my next meal since my rent was so high. Yes it was beautiful and I had amazing friends and great times but there was a sadness that lingered that only I knew. On the outside I was glowing and appeared to have the dream life but on the inside I longed for something more meaningful. Who's gonna want to share all that on Facebook?

Two weeks before my lease on my apartment came to a close I sold all of my belongings. I wanted freedom. I surrendered my dreams of being on the stage and opened myself up to whatever life wanted to hand me. Lucky for me my leap of faith took me to Russia for a gig two weeks later where I then proceeded to Italy to backpack and met my husband.

Life has had many twists and turns over the last couple of years and has had us living in a small tourist/retirement community in South Carolina. It's been an interesting couple of years and I've learned a lot as I have transitioned into a full time yoga instructor/kirtan singer and writer. Although I love my life and the beauty that is in it I still am guilty of comparing my life to my friends on social media as if my life should look different than it is. Then I remember, this is my journey and that is theirs. We all have a path. We can create and plan our life but sometimes it takes us for a ride in another direction. What's important is that we understand the direction we are going is the one of our true calling even if life is challenging at the time. It's up to us to find the silver lining and continue forward embracing the gifts we have right now.

One of the biggest mistakes we can make is comparing our journey to another. As the Bhagavad Gita says, "It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of someone else's life with perfection."


This statement brings such peace to me when I lose my way in comparing another's life to my own. We are all guilty of this in some shape or form but just remember your journey is unique and special. It's the footprint you leave behind that no one else can. Enjoy and celebrate your uniqueness and follow your bliss. Trust in yourself and trust in your path.

Women Celebrating Women

Today is International Women's day. Although it's on our calendars it's not widely recognized, therefore I wanted to bring awareness to it. I could go on about the women in our history books, like Harriet Tubman, Ann Frank, Emily Dickinson, Amelia Earhart, Helen Kellar, Rosa Parks, Mother Theresa and thousands of others but today I want to recognize the women making a difference right now. In my life and in yours.

We celebrate mother's Day in May but why not celebrate them every day! Whether your relationship with your mother is good or not we can simply recognize our life would not exist had she chose not to have you. Thank you to mommies everywhere for giving the gift of life. Thank you for choosing to carry us in your womb for nine months and endure the pain of birth for us to be alive. Thank you to my mama who not only raised me but loves me with every fiber in her being. Thank you for the sacrifices you have made. Your strength, wisdom, love and discipline have helped mold me in the woman I am today.

Let's honor the friends in our lives. The women who are the ears that listen and the shoulders we cry on. These are the women who love us as family without blood. These are the women we trust with our secrets and go to for advice. These are the women that help pick us up when we fall, encourage us to dream big and inspire us. My friends over the years have become my sisters. I couldn't imagine my life without them. The friends in my life also dream big and are in constant give back to their communities as well as their families. From being incredible mom's raising incredible human beings, to caring for the ocean, to caring for the hungry and sharing their talents with the world. Thank you thank you for the work you do in the world and in my life.








Speaking of sisters... Let's love on our sisters. These are the blood bonded women of our lives. These are the women who love us unconditionally even when we aren't our best. They are the perfect combination of family and friend. We sacrifice for one another, entrust in one another and would do anything for each other. When I was a child I begged my mama for a little sister and when I was twelve years old I was finally blessed with the most incredible sister in the world. I'm proud of the woman she has become. She's a woman making an impact in the world, fighting for animal rights and educating people on culture. She says I inspire her but the presence of her in my life has inspired me to become a better woman for the last twenty years.

 Grandmas, aunts, cousins, teachers, nurses, doctors, co-workers and artists. The women in our life come from all kinds of backgrounds and relatedness. To be quite honest I don't have enough time or words to acknowledge each and every woman in my life that has had a profound impact on my life. But today they are all in my heart and on my mind. I am so humbled and grateful for the incredible women I am constantly surrounded by.


So today whether you tell them or not, celebrate the magical women in your life and even just for a second acknowledge and thank them in your own right. We have come so far as women. Let's not stop here. The more we love and respect one another the stronger our society will become. Today I celebrate all of you. Thank you for the love you give and strength you have and the talents you share.

Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained

March 1, 2015

My first yoga teacher used to always say, "nothing ventured, nothing gained". Back in those early days of yoga I was so much in my mind these words would sometimes just pass me by until one day they didn't. I had been wanting to fly, meaning balance on my arms and lift my legs into crow pose (bakasana). My teacher and the other practitioners seemed to effortlessly lift off while my arms shook and my wrists ached as I ever so gently lifted one toe off the ground. Why couldn't I get this?!

I had to be willing to fall flat on my face. I had to be willing to let go of looking silly in class. I had to let go of what others thought. I had to let go of all my expectations. I practiced everyday at home and in class, crashing to the floor each time I lifted both feet. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Then one day in class my teacher led us once again into this pose and with the glorious balance of effort and surrender I flew for the first time. My mind was clear and my body was light. "Kamila, look I'm doing it!, I said in the loudest whisper I could muster. She glanced over with a smile and I crashed to the floor but I didn't care. I got there.

That moment lives in me each time I approach a pose that challenges me as well as in my life. How can you know you can achieve something if you never try. Will you let the fear of falling or failing stop you? Or, will you allow yourself to fall time and again until you don't? Remember if it doesn't challenge you, there is no growth.

"Nothing ventured, nothing gained." 

(Dedicated to my first teacher Kamila in Las Vegas. Thank you.)