Look Beyond Your Purchase

The season of shopping has started and the holidays are just around the corner. I love the holidays but recently found myself fairly disgusted and the sale frenzy that happens. I went to Best Buy on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and saw two men camping in the rain waiting for the doors to open on Friday. A couple years ago they started opening up select stores at 1 and 2am on Black Friday. This year they started the sales on Thanksgiving day as early as 3pm. Luckily this year I didn't hear of anyone dying from being trampled but we all know it's happened before.

Some say it's in good fun, it's tradition or it's good for the economy. I agree to an extent but what happened to the value of the holidays themselves? When did it become about buying a bunch of material things that we don't need, sacrificing our days to camp outside of stores and trampling over human beings to get them?


Holidays are about being with family, friends, honoring the season and for a lot of people God. In yoga we are taught the five Yamas ( a series of "right living"/ethical rules)

 One being...

Aparigraha meaning non-attachment (non-grasping)/possessiveness or greed. 

Yes shopping can be fun and giving presents is fun too but it's important to evaluate what importance we are giving to material possessions and just how far we will go to get them. Are you opening credit cards, overcharging them or tapping into your savings account to purchase beyond your means? If so this is a good time to look within and see as to why. A lot of times we buy things to avoid or fill a void. Sometimes we even buy just to look good. I can speak to this as I have been guilty of all of things before.


I'm not saying don't spend money I'm just saying keep yourself in check and don't forget what this season is truly about. Take what you need and give what you can. Sometimes quality time and hug from you is all someone needs.

Happy Holidays & Namaste

The Art of Giving and Recieving

When is the last time you received something and allowed yourself to actually receive it?

This week I observed and noticed many of us have a lot to learn in how to receive. Whether it be a compliment, a favor or help.

 While out and about a beautiful friend of mine received many compliments from our friends stating how pretty and young she looked. She replied uncomfortably laughing and brushed it off. "Aww, thanks guys but my hair is a mess and I have circles under my eyes. I don't feel pretty." Everyone then proceeded to convince her. I couldn't help but think, "is she fishing for a compliment?" and if so, why can't she accept it?

Later in the week another friend of mine ran into some serious health problems. I was told she took herself to the emergency room and had to rest for the next three days. I was shocked to hear this news because the last time I saw her she showed no signs of being in pain. Now let me just state, this woman is one of the most generous, kind and loving people I know. She goes out of her way to show love and kindness to others and never expects anything in return. But when she needs help she doesn't request it and refuses it when it's being graciously given. She is so loved, why won't she accept the help?

I mention my friends not to judge them but because I too have been in situations like this and these experiences I feel are relate able to others as well.

I consciously practice the art of receiving but even I struggle at times to receive the compliments and help from others.  Several weeks back I was pretty sick. A few friends and colleges offered if there was anything they could do to let them know. I found myself thinking, "that's just something people say". I said thank you but I didn't need anything. Then a friend text me and said, "I make the best soup for healing when your sick. Want me to make you some?" My first thought was no. I didn't want someone to go out of the way for me. But why? She offered. So instead of declining, I accepted her offer. Let me tell you, I'm glad I did and I am so grateful for her generosity.  It really was a delicious healing soup!

 On the other side of the coin is giving. I may be wrong here but I feel like most people just want to help and make a difference. We all want to give. After all, when we make someone happy we make ourselves happy. Maybe this is why it's easier to give than receive. However when we give, are we giving freely or expecting something in return?

To give freely we have no attachment to the outcome. We give to give and that makes us happy. When we give to receive something back we set ourselves up for disappointment when it doesn't meet our expectations. We are all guilty of this somewhere and that's fine. After all we are human.

I love to give to others and make them feel good. I love to encourage people and acknowledge people but even I am guilty of having expectations of how someone should receive it. I recently gave a card of acknowledgment  to a friend that helped me. I felt so good doing this until I didn't receive a thank you for my thank you. Pretty funny huh? I had to look at what was going on inside me. Why did I give the card in the first place? Was it to look good or did I genuinely mean it? After careful consideration of my feelings and upset I came to the conclusion it was my ego that needed acknowledgment not me.  She's an attention hog to say the least. I found compassion for myself to let it go and allowed myself to graciously give my gratitude with nothing in return.

 When is the last time you gave something to another and how carefree were you about the result?

This week I encourage you to do one good deed a day and not tell anyone about it. Allow yourself to get creative with this. Maybe it's cleaning the office or sending flowers to someone or baking cookies or a thank you card ect. It could be folding your significant others clothes or cleaning up after someone else. The gesture can be simple or elaborate. You will know what to do when it's time.

 Enjoy the happiness giving freely gives you. And, don't forget to allow yourself to receive when someone else is giving to you whether it be a compliment, a favor, a gift or help. We are all in this together. Let's give, love and receive with grace and ease.


Namaste

The Power of Meditation

As I sit down each morning for my daily meditation I try to keep an open mind as to receive whatever needs to be received. Some days are more challenging than others. There are times I am disturbed by whatever comes into my mind. Some days I cannot find a comfortable seat and find myself wiggling and opening my eyes to check the time. Other days I feel I could sit there forever feeling such peace and love. Whatever the experience I remind myself this is a journey and stay committed. I have also found that no matter the experience of my meditation I can go about my day with more strength and joy. I have been finding myself feeling more connected others including the ones that have felt separate from me. The other day I experienced the most powerful meditation within my practice yet and I realize if I don't share it, it can easily slip away into the abyss.

I was repeating a mantra in my mind and focusing on the space in between the end of the mantra and the beginning of the mantra. It's a space of nothingness, a space of purity. As I focused on this space repeating the mantra I felt butterflies in my stomach. You know the kind when your excited to go to Disney Land as kid or the kind when your falling in love? It was a feeling of pure joy and love. It started to build and build! I almost couldn't take it. Then, just as I recognized it and named it, it disappeared. For the duration of my mediation I kept trying to get back to that space but couldn't.

Toward the end of the meditation images of people I felt incomplete with or people I felt disconnected to flooded my mind. I found myself getting upset. They were ruining my meditation! Just as I started to focus back to the mantra the bell rang. The time I set aside for mediation was complete. I opened my eyes and contemplated what had just happened.

Then it hit me! Those that I described as ruining my meditation were me! Yes, they were people I know but all representing a piece of me that I have not been complete with. They are all a reflection of me! When I project anger or upset toward them I am projecting it onto pieces of me I don't like or have not forgiven myself for. It became clear there is no one else out there. As a yoga teacher I teach everything is connected. Logically I understand this and have even felt it but this was different. I really got the unity of human beings. When I got "they are me", I filled with compassion and forgiveness for myself. In return, I could feel nothing but love and compassion for them. Just then, the feeling of purity and love I kept trying to get back to in my meditation returned.

By practicing this awareness my world has shifted. However sharing is the key...

If you find it challenging to sit and meditate know you are no different than anyone else. We all are challenged in this practice. It takes work to sit there and be with yourself but it gets easier. I share this experience with you for two reasons.  1. to not lose it myself
2. to encourage you to meditate so that you too can experience this kind of bliss.

Happy meditating and Namaste.

The Faces of Truth

Satya - Truthfulness

This can take the form of many areas in ones life. The first one being, what words we speak. You can ask yourself, is what I 'm saying hold truth? It's easy to get caught up in gossip or tell white lies but are they serving your highest purpose? Is it serving others? This can be a tricky because I believe most people do not want to hurt another persons feelings and the best way to do that is to talk to someone else about it or tell white lies. Whatever the reason is, it's a good thing to look at within oneself.

 Another form of truthfulness may be what you stand for. Have you ever been conflicted when something was happening that you didn't agree of but said nothing? Recently I was in a conversation with a friend and he said that he acted like a girl sometimes. I asked, how so? He replied with an answer of sorts, that he was over emotional or cried and whined sometimes. Because I'm comfortable with him I asked him how is that acting like a girl? He said girls are emotional creatures, I think he even said unstable. I corrected him and said women are sensitive creatures with empathy but to say "I'm acting like a girl" in that way seemed negative and stereo typical. This is something I believe we need to stray from and empower women. I know he meant no harm by the comment but that's how ingrained these stereo types are. A few days later another man colleague said he whines like a girl when it's cold. I didn't say anything and walked away. I don't know if it was because I was not as comfortable speaking with him about it or if I just didn't want to get into it right then but later I wish I had said something. Not to start an argument or to make someone wrong but because it's a subject matter I feel strongly about. Who knows, what I have to say may shift someones perspective to something new and empowering.

Lastly, are you living from your truth? Deep inside each and every one of us we have a purpose to fulfill. Sometimes we are unaware if it because of the business of our lives or our loud and chattering minds but we all at some point feel there's something more to this equation. By sitting and meditating we can get closer to this deep truth and live it. Once you have a grasp on what it is, you can look at your life to see if it aligns. If it doesn't... Changes will have to be made. This isn't always an easy task. Sometimes this comes in the form of quitting a job or walking away from certain people but in the end if the actions you are taking honor your highest truth (highest self) you cannot lose.

Satya... What does truthfulness mean to you and how can you incorporate it into your everyday life?

Santosha

Santosha:
 Contentment; being satisfied with the resources at hand - therefore not desiring more

As we enter the season of gratitude and thanksgiving we can also find Santosha. When we find gratitude for what is we can also find contentment.

It's easy to always want more as it's part of the human condition. And, although striving for a goal or to desire more is healthy and encouraged it's even more so to be content with what is. After all, right now is truly all we have. The past and the future only exist within our minds. They are merely stories we tell and create. Right now is all that exists.

When we find gratitude and contentment in the present moment, suffering of what should be or what could have been disappears. When suffering disappears the worries of the future do as well and if we can  continue to hold that space of energy the future moment shifts as well.

I find that when I start to worry of what could be and then become present to the abundance of the present  I can proceed with my goals of the future with joy. This is far more beneficial that anxiety when approaching something new.

My life is currently shifting as I transition from performing full time to teaching yoga and writing full time. At times I can get caught up with worries of the money or how is every thing going to work out. But when I look around at my present moment I find peace. I can enjoy my sound of the breeze and the new autumn chill. I can enjoy my husband and his passion for soccer as I hear  him yell at the game he is watching as I write my blog. I can enjoy the way my kitty snuggles up to me and shows me unconditional love. Everything is just as it should be. After all, right now is all we have and in a moment this too shall pass.

So why not enrich your life with finding gratitude and contentment for what is with no stories of the past or future. Then, watch how your perspective shifts.

What can you let go of to find Santosha right now?