Why is it we post on Facebook? I've often thought of this question over the years. First I used Facebook to reconnect with old friends and to stay in touch with the people I care about. Then I used it to market myself as a singer inviting everyone to the gigs I was playing and share my YouTube videos. Eventually I found myself posting like a madwomen documenting every moment in my life.
Sometime last year while I was still living in LA, I was out with a couple of my girlfriends at the beautiful Getty Museum. It's a gorgeous world famous art museum at the top of a hill that over looks all of Los Angeles. Each wing represented a different form of art and it also includes a gorgeous garden to walk through or sit down in. My girlfriends and I were being silly and taking pictures as we enjoyed the vibrant sunny day. That's when I found myself compulsively taking pictures and video of every moment I deemed as awesome and posted them immediately to Facebook. I was doing this so much so that I forgot to be in the present moment that was laughing with my friends, talking and enjoying the view. Then I heard a voice, "What are you doing? Why are posting on Facebook when you could be enjoying the moment you are trying so hard to document for everyone else?" In that moment I couldn't answer. It was as if I was completely addicted. But to what?
(a picture posted from the Getty)
After chewing on it for a few days I realized I was addicted to creating this image of myself for others so that they would "like it" or think "WOW, her life is so cool!" Plain and simple... I wanted to look good. Which is fairly easy to do if you smile, click and post.
I became angry with myself and in return angry with all the "happy posters". If I felt full of shit then they must be too. I stopped posting for a while focusing on being in the moment. That was an incredible experience. I found myself engaging with my friends. I was actually listening to them and enjoying their presence and enjoying what we were doing instead of focusing on "hold on... let me share this with several hundred people I barely know"
I started posting again in September 2012 while I was traveling Russia and Italy but my posts were for different reasons. I was traveling alone so I made a promise to post frequently to let my mom know I was safe. After returning to the states I didn't post as much, just a little to keep my friends updated on all the changes that were happening in my life as I was moving to the other coast for a theater gig and newly engaged.
As I adjusted to the changes in my life I would post occasionally. Mostly to tell my friends how much I miss them. There were a lot of emotional times but I'm not one to post complaints or feelings on Facebook. So I just didn't post. What was the point really?
Then I came across an article that stated people who post "happy posts" tend to be happier people. Hmmm... could this be true? Most articles disagree with this notion. I decided to try it on. I posted more often the "happy times" in my day. I did start to feel happier. Why? My conclusion on this is that by purposly finding those moments made me more aware of them. However I also found that by posting too often felt draining.
So now what? I'm left with this....
Post if it makes you happy but only that. Life is happening in the NOW. No matter how many pictures, quotes or posts you have it can't be more precious than the quality time you have with those actual moments. Don't post to compare your life to someone else. Virtual life is not real life. Real life is what's happening right now.
So... To post or not to post? It's all perspective. Be honest with yourself and be conscious. Choose what makes you happy then let go of judgement.
What are your thoughts?
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